Application For Auburn Redneck Driver's LicenseApplication For Auburn Redneck Driver's LicenseApplication For Auburn
Driver's License

Auburn Handbags by Alan Stuart

Last name: ________________ First name: (Check appropriate box)
[_] Billy-Bob [_] Bobby-Sue [_] Billy-Joe [_] Bobby-Jo
[_] Billy-Ray [_] Bobby-Ann [_] Billy-Sue [_] Bobby-Lee
[_] Billy-Mae [_] Bobby-Ellen
[_] Billy-Jack [_] Bobby-Beth Ann Sue

Age: ____ (if unsure, guess)
Sex: ____ M _____ F _____ Not sure
Shoe Size: ____ Left ____ Right

[_] Farmer [_] Mechanic [_] Hair Dresser [_] Waitress
[_] Unemployed [_] Dirty Politician

Spouse's Name: __________________________
2nd Spouse's Name: __________________________
3rd Spouse's Name: __________________________
Spell S-P-O-U-S-E ___________________________

Relationship with spouse: [_] Sister [_] Aunt
[_] Brother [_] Uncle [_] Mother [_] Son
[_] Father [_] Daughter [_] Cousin [_] Pet

Number of children living in household:___
Number of children living in shed: ___
Number of cows living in your front yard ___
Number of children that are yours: ___

Mother's Name: _______________________
Father's Name: _______________________(If not sure, leave blank)

Education: 1 2 3 4 (Circle highest grade completed)

Do you [_] own or [_] rent your mobile home? (Check appropriate box)

Vehicles you own and where you keep them:
___ Total number of vehicles you own
___ Number of vehicles that still crank
___ Number of vehicles in front yard
___ Number of tractor in back yard
___ Number of tractor out by the shed
___ Number of vehicles on cement blocks

Firearms you own and where you keep them:
____ truck ____ kitchen
____ bedroom ____ bathroom ____ shed

Model and year of your pickup: _____________ 196_

Do you have a gun rack? [_] Yes [_] No; If no, please explain:

Newspapers/magazines you subscribe to:
[_] The National Enquirer [_] The Globe
[_] TV Guide [_] Soap Opera Digest
[_] Rifle and Shotgun [_] Armed and Ready!

___ Number of times you've seen a UFO
___ Number of times you've seen Elvis
___ Number of times you slept with Elvis
___ Number of times you've seen Elvis in a UFO

How often do you bathe:
[_] Weekly [_] Monthly [_] Not Applicable

How many teeth?___
Color of teeth:
[_] Yellow [_] Brownish-Yellow
[_] Brown [_] Black [_] N/A

Brand of chewing tobacco you prefer:
[_] Red-Man

How far is your home from a paved road?
[_] 1 mile [_] 2 miles
[_] What's a paved road?

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A AUBURN FAMILYCLICK TO ENTER auburn Guide To Dating Etiquette
Pull My Finger

Modern Man Descends To The Lowest Life Form!

* NOTE: Intended as a parody only. Any resemblence to actual person names is purely coincidental. *